Thankful in All Things

Man oh man do you ever just have those days...weeks...when it seems life just has it out for you? I have no clue how that statement measures up biblically speaking, but I do know that is how it has been feeling around here the past few days...nearly a week really. I wish I could see the big picture in moments like these. I wish I could see past the pain, past the hurt, past the tears, past the confusion...I wish I could see the story, the healing, the inexpressible joy, the soveign perfection of his plan. Why am I so blind? So selfish? So prideful?

Oh my precious Jesus how I need thee. Oh how I need thee.

This past week has brought some unexpecteds in my life that I never saw coming. Some conversations that have held so much hurt, my heart still lays tattered inside my chest. I have been challenged in some areas that I didn't even know existed until several days ago. I have felt defeated, run over, discouraged, not-so-lovingly wounded even. It is funny how you have no idea how precious something is until you realize that you don't have it anymore. And by the time you realize that change has occured, there is no room to even look back on how it used to be; the loss stings a bit and yet the process of losing resonates deep inside, as the pain intensifies with the continual drudge of a heartbeat that must keep in beating.

Through the stream of unexpecteds over the past week, through the fear and trembling as my salvation stands firm, through the tears and groans of my ever-heavy heart, through the laborous toils and mundane tasks that must be accomplished in the midst of it all, I have seen learned oneTruth that I cannot seem to escape.

For some reason I cannot escape this one little verse all week. Three times in a period of several days the Lord presented before my eyes...once in a quiet time, once in a book and again from a fellow blogger. So it got me thinking...

Ephesians 5:20 reads, "…always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."

What does he really mean by this? I mean it says to always give thanks for everything...if we really took this scripture for what it says, then how would that change the position of my heart? Well, honestly, it would be weird...I mean who says they're thankful for the earthquakes in Japan for example? What would I think if someone told me that they were thankful I was sick today? Such a concept just seems to scream CRAZY! The first thought in my mind is this can't be right...people are going to think I've gone off the deep end. And yet, is there ever anything about scripture that seems to mesh well with the ways of the world? In fact, James tells us about friendship with the world all right..."You adulterous people, don't you know that friendship with the world is hatred toward God? Anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God."

After a bit of wrestling this one out, I have come to the conclusion that, much to my dimay, the Lord intends for this verse to resonate deeply in the way in which I walk through life. So here I am. I know that I am commanded to give thanks for all things, to Him.

Too bad doing so means putting a pause on that spinning cycle of self-pity I've been lost in.

• Thank you for the pain.
• Thank you for arguements.
• Thank you for hours of crying.
• Thank you that no one showed up to an event I planned.
• Thank you for never letting the words come out how I practice them.
• Thank you for taking something precious.
• Thank you for loneliness.
• Thank you for change, for unexpected change of course.
• Thank you for my people-pleasing skills.
• Thank you for food poisoning.

I need to start thanking my God for ALL things. Even before they start working together for my good.